Clinic Visit

I had my visit to the breast clinic this morning.  I found it much harder going after the fiasco of last week.  Shed quite a few tears before I left.  Anyway, I managed to do it and get through the thirty-five minute wait but came home with few answers.

For the last three days I have been getting a bright red area that starts in my armpit and spreading onto the left side of my breast, several inches across.  The district nurse yesterday thought it might be an infection so she was pleased I was attending the clinic this morning.  Now this redness comes and goes.  It will be there for a few hours and then fade away to almost nothing.  So to be sure Caspar knew what I was talking about, Mike took a couple of photos late yesterday afternoon.  I also wanted to find out about the lump under my armpit and whether it was fluid, perhaps infected fluid and needed draining and antibiotics.

To cut a long story short Caspar has no idea what is causing the redness.  He studied the photos.  He studied me, he could see it was still slightly pink.  He said it could be caused by my clothes rubbing again flesh that was still tender.  I pointed out that yesterday afternoon I went to bed for two hours, I was not wearing clothes, the window was open and my scarred body received lots of fresh air, yet when I woke it was bright red!!! Nothing could have rubbed. He said well, it is definitely not infection as there is no swelling and I am not running a temperature.  Trust me to have something mysterious.

Anyway he poked and prodded, said there was no problem whatever with the wound, it had healed remarkably well.  The lump under my armpit is not fluid, it is hard.  I think it is something he called the axilla, in other words it has been disturbed by the surgery and might be like that permanently.

I then mentioned the amount of pain I am getting.  He said it could be the nerves trying to recover from the surgery and that some women were more sensitive than others and with the passing of time it should lessen and lessen.  Well, he should try living with it.

So, all in all, no infection, no reason found for the redness, the pain will just have to be borne for the foreseeable future.  I told him how worrying I find this redness and pain but he assured me again and again there he can find absolutely no problems.  As he is a top man in his field I have to accept that.

Lastly, it has been decided, after a few days of discussion, that despite my family history that Tamoxifen is the drug they want me to be on.  I fully discussed my family history which is mainly on the male side and involved furring of the arteries as the biggest problem.  I was told what they worried about was break-away blood clots which is different.  This only happened to one member of my family, again a male.  They then said that although possible side effects have to be printed on leaflets, the chances of anything bad happening are exceedingly small and the good effects have to be weighed against the bad.  I could see the sense in that.  After all, the last thing I want is the cancer returning. I want to be rid of it forever.

So, I have had to accept their decision.  I think taking any drugs worries me, I do not even like being on all the ones I already have to take.  But I must get on with it.

The two side effects most common and that I am likely to get are nausea and hot flushes and sweats.  Oh God, I thought I had seen the last of them years ago!!!  I hope I do not develop the nausea either because next week I have to go for my radiotherapy assessment (Wednesday afternoon) and the following week I start the course of radiotherapy.  Bad enough having to get there every day without feeling constantly sick as well.

So, my friends, that is all my up to date news on me and bc.  I know you will continue to pray for me.  I ask you to pray that the side-effects of the tablets are as little as possible because nothing must get in the way of my radiotherapy.

Oh, one last thing.  One of the district nurses chatted about my blood sugars last week andagreed they could not stay as high as they have been/are in the long term.  She told me to stop taking readings over Easter to give myself a break and stress pushes them higher.  She kindly phoned the diabetic nurse at my surgery and had a long chat with her .  Kim, the diabetic nurse agreed that I should not take them over Easter and that she would phone me to have a chat and possibly arrange to see me and assess whether there should be an increase in my diabetic meds if necessary and that it would be on Tuesday or Wednesday.  Guess what, as if you haven't already.  I have not heard a single word from the diabetic nurse.  Guess I have been forgotten about.  So, I will have to try and make an appointment to see her next week.  More aggro.

I just wish things would run smoothly in my life just once in a while.

I have some new photos of Nathan and Daniel.  I will share those with you next time.

Love